We are flying through the academic year and, for some little learners, it’s all getting a bit tedious!
The reality of going to school day in, day out is wearing thin for some, and it can be a real struggle for parents to deal with.
One such parent recently messaged Letterkenny Babies Facebook page: “My daughter started junior infants in September and was loving every day and everything and everyone in school until last week. Now, out of the blue, she doesn’t want to go. Every morning is a struggle getting changed, getting into the car and at the school gate she goes into hysterics! I have spoken to the teacher, there are no issues with other classmates. In fact they are a great comfort to her and don’t like seeing her cry.
“The teacher says every time work is mentioned she starts to cry. She just doesn’t want to do it, but one to one, she does great. At home she loves learning her new words and letters also. We, as parents, have tried to sit down and talk about it with her calmly and in a sensitive way. We have also tried a firmer approach; we have tried all kinds of bribes but nothing is working. I cry most mornings at the school gate when I leave because I just don’t know what to do next. The teacher says to keep going but it’s soul destroying and I feel so helpless and awful for putting her through this, but as I said, I don’t know what to do anymore. Please help.”
Thankfully, the mum got some great advice on the page: “Our little girl was the same. At first, the routine was great. We were setting her uniform out on the bed at night and she dressed herself in the mornings no bother. Then the crying started and she didn’t want to get dressed. We’d a few weeks of struggling to get down the stairs in good time but we kept up the routine of her needing to dress herself. She eventually went back to doing all these jobs again herself.
“I find consistency so important. We did introduce a morning routine chart. She had to move the sticker over to one side when that job was done. She loved this and a little treat at the weekend if the chart was completed every day. A few weeks of that and she stopped doing it but she was back to herself.
“Maybe check in with school and see how she’s coping with the work. The tears at the gate are hard but you’re doing the right thing by letting her settle herself. Prolonging the goodbye won’t help anybody and you’ll eventually give in and take her with you. Then you’ll have a huge problem.
“Have chats with her casually while you’re playing to see what she says.
“Also, if I notice my daughter is a little off when she wakes or starts to moan about getting up, I’ll ignore it and just distract her by saying ‘Oh so many days until Friday’, or ‘Guess whose party you’re going to on Saturday?’ Even seeing who can get dressed the quickest. Just something nice and positive to change her train of thought. It works every time. She’s in senior infants now and skips out the door every day! Good luck mammy, it will all be ok!”
Louise Flanagan is an admin of Letterkenny Babies Facebook page and the author of the children’s book series Dragonterra and Dream Beasts. www.dragonterra.ie
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